Step One to Effective 1-on-1 Meetings

Building a happy team all starts with caring enough about your reports’ wellbeing to ask them.

Here at FloSports we focus a lot of attention on employee happiness. We know that when folks love to work at a company, it has positive effects on every aspect of the business.

It fosters a great culture, results in a better product for end users, and makes it easier to recruit new talent. Additionally, since on-boarding new employees is a costly drain on both time and money, finding ways to reduce turnover can magnify those impacts exponentially.

“Great!” you say, “But how?”

There are entire books written on this subject, but one prerequisite to improve anything is to measure it. So, first things first, our HR team has become diligent in measuring internal NPS. Once we know that baseline and gather the feedback, we can actually work to make improvements.

Our engineering team has led the way at FloSports with the highest internal NPS score. Because of our scores averaging in the enviable 40–65 range, managers in other departments have pinged me that are curious about what practices they might be able to implement with their teams.

My first tip is to really really care about it. The Flo Engineering leadership team meets regularly to discuss pertinent issues. We use each other as sounding boards, and we collectively seek ways to make the experience of our team better.

Just like gardening, a plant won’t grow unless you water it regularly! Focus on being a better manager, get a group together and work through ways you can learn from each other, and it will start to happen.

But secondly, one of the most important tools in a manager’s toolbox is having regular 1-on-1 meetings with each of your direct reports. However, in the experience of many, these meetings can become redundant and ineffective at accomplishing that task. They often morph into little more than project status updates and, at best, you end up giving them some advice with a task they’ve been struggling to complete.

And that’s great, but if that’s the bulk of the meeting, then you’re both missing out on an opportunity.

In this article I’m going to stick to just one thing, so don’t expect this to be a complete guide to everything you should be doing in one-on-ones. Maybe we’ll expand upon that some other time.

The first and most important question that I ask… and I generally open every meeting with this question is… wait for it…. “How are you doing?”

Not exactly revolutionary, right? The thing about me asking my report that simple question is I don’t mean it in the flippant way that it’s often used. We say “how’s it going?” as we pass someone in the hall, without ever actually waiting for an answer. It’s basically just “hello” in common speech.

But when I ask them how they’re doing, I do it with a tone that they know I mean it seriously and I want a serious answer. And I don’t want necessarily an answer about work. I want to know how their life is going. Are they wrestling with a tough life decision? Is a family member sick? Did they do something really fun over the weekend? Did their kid win an award?

The power of asking “how are you doing” and really meaning it, is that it lets them know that you care about them as a person. And you can’t try to just fake it… you really actually have to care!

Too often employees feel like just cogs in the wheel. Their manager only really cares about if their being productive little worker bees and closing tickets.

Good managers take a personal interest in their reports and invest themselves into their wellbeing. When you begin to let them know that you honestly care about them personally, you’ll find a whole new world opens up to talk about how they’re doing professionally as well.

It builds up the trust that they have in you to share things with you. They’re going to be more apt to tell you about the thing that they’re struggling with. They’re going to let you know that they’re feeling stuck in a rut, wondering what their future is, or thinking about looking for another job. They’re going to share with you the person who is bringing the team morale down. And, hopefully, they’re also going to feel comfortable enough to give you feedback on things you could be doing better as well. (and you better be receptive!)

But it all starts with genuinely asking: “How are you doing?”

Try it in your next one-on-one. And if they give you a flip answer like “fine” or they start talking about work… stop them… and ask again. Not the job. Not superficially. How are you really doing personally? Start with that, and then build from there!